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The unexpected feeling of success…

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The unexpected feeling of success

An interesting theme I’ve noticed…

One of the interesting themes I see in women who grow into bigger, more successful and satisfied versions of themselves is that the way they FEEL when they get that success is not what they expected…

When women start making the money they really want.

When they start enjoying the kind of work/life balance they want, and pursuing their hobbies.

When they start having the quality of support and care in their relationships that they’ve always yearned for…

When they start having the sex they really want, and trusting themselves to have their own back and speak their boundaries when necessary, and prioritising themselves and loving themselves and fiercely going after the things that they want and telling the truth even when its hard and letting go of toxic people and workplaces and exercising and eating well and having more energy and alllllll the other things that women want…

They expect to be in some kind of peak state. 💪 💥

They’ve often imagined this more evolved version of themselves as something MORE than they are today.

And while yes – often they are brighter, they do let themselves take up more space, they do speak up more fiercely when necessary and are braver in their risk taking, the tone that actually permeates their transformation is that they are more RELAXED.

As the striving, proving and stress melt out of their systems, they become supple, and radiant. They move more slowly but get more done. They laugh more, and breathe deeper. Their eyes sparkle. They are softer.

The calling card of a woman who is truly successful, satisfied, well supported and surrounded by people who respect, love and uphold her, is her relaxed, open and quiet nervous system.

From this ground in herself, she can build and create anything she desires in the world!

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Never underestimate the power of your past. Because it’s not in the past. It’s here in this living moment with you – woven into your responses, choices and perceptions; baked into your nervous system and psyche through and reinforcement and repetition.

That doesn’t mean your past has to define you, not at all.

Though, you’re lying to yourself if you say ‘its in the past’, yet have done no work to clear the ripples of that past from your system to create space for something new.

Yesterday, in a session with my coach, I went ‘back in time’ to the end of 2020, when I went through an experience that was somewhat challenging for me.

Here is a sublime example

Despite acknowledging the challenge at the time, I realised looking back that I hadn’t fully resolved or digested what happened there.

Part of me stayed frozen in that experience, and on the subtlest of levels, I have gotten in my own way unconsciously ever since.

That past experience was with me in every moment. It informed my capacity and energy levels, choices and perceptions.

And this is how the past shapes us – you have experiences that your system ‘learns’ from, and you then – often completely unconsciously – adjust accordingly to avoid repeating painful or difficult events.

We are such clever adaptive creatures.

But, those ‘adaptations’ will inadvertently shape your behaviour, attitudes, thoughts and feelings in a way that can begin to inhibit your ability to fully show up for your business or career, relationships, and life in general.

If you bring the process of ‘learning’ from these past experiences into consciousness, you gift yourself the chance to mine the gold from the past, get the learnings and gifts link example: and then move forward with your life.

„ QUOTE DESIGN: I CALL THIS PROCESS ‘DIGESTING’ YOUR PAST EXPERIENCES, AND HAVE SPECIFIC PRACTICES I TEACH TO SUPPORT YOU TO DO THIS.“

I call this process ‘digesting’ your past experiences, and have specific practices I teach to support you to do this.

The challenges of the past – and your adaptations – can become like a cage you find yourself living in if you’re not aware, but this digestion process ensures your continued liberation…

Which past experiences do you need to free yourself from?

And this is how the past shapes us – you have experiences that your system ‘learns’ from, and you then – often completely unconsciously – adjust accordingly to avoid repeating painful or difficult events.

We are such clever adaptive creatures.

But, those ‘adaptations’ will inadvertently shape your behaviour, attitudes, thoughts and feelings in a way that can begin to inhibit your ability to fully show up for your business or career, relationships, and life in general.

If you bring the process of ‘learning’ from these past experiences into consciousness, you gift yourself the chance to mine the gold from the past, get the learnings.

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