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Sex in the Workplace

sex in the workplace
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(…and I don’t mean doing it on the photocopier with your colleague…)

🫦

Too many smart, driven women today are disconnected from the current of their vital, primal, sexual aliveness; and they’re suffering as a result.

Our culture’s obsession with productivity, busyness and results, combined with sexuality having been made taboo has created the perfect storm for women to leave behind their connection with their sex and migrate to way over-valuing their intellect and strategy.

I’ve lost count of the number of times professionally successful women have told me ‘pleasure seems superfluous’… (because it doesn’t appear to directly contribute to production).

The unsurprising thing, from my perspective, is that these are often the very same women who are burnt out, feeling unfulfilled in life and experiencing hormonal imbalances from chronic stress and depletion.

Can you think of a woman you know who’s in approval of her connection with her sexuality and pleasure?

You can feel her. She feels different.

When you think of her, what do you think and feel?

Is there judgement? Jealousy? Longing?

As a society, we’ve glorified measurable success so completely that people who choose a life that doesn’t validate that model are often judged and envied.

It can also be confronting to come face to face with someone giving themselves a permission that you aren’t…

 

So what about Sex in the Workplace?

Specifically, women who are driven in business or career are often extra susceptible to external environmental pressure to trust their intellect over their deeper body wisdom, to rely on strategy over passion and to prioritise tasks and activities that produce measurable outcomes related to their goals and KPI’s over those that feel good for feeling good’s sake.

But when a woman is full and alive in her connection to her sexuality, she shows up differently…

She brings special creativity and resourcefulness to table. 

She has energy, passion and radiance that fuels her efforts and allows her to sustain a sense of creative, dynamic aliveness throughout a project. She will likely be more intuitive and trust her instincts, finding new creative solutions as a result.

She will likely have firm boundaries. Her approval of her connection to herself means she can clearly sense what is a ‘yes please!’ and whats a ’no, thank you’ for her.

And, she’ll do all of this while enjoying herself. This woman has FUN in her life – she’s turned on in herself, her motor running and she orients towards experiences and people that support her to have more of the same, because she’s given herself that permission.

Sexuality has become so commodified and sterilised that the true essence of it as a deeply healthy wellspring of nourishment, radiance, creative aliveness, personal power and self love have been lost.

We all want more of these women on our team, right? Don’t you want to do business with these women??

Don’t you want to BE one of these women??

It’s way more normal now to hear conversations about the importance of valuing mental health and wellbeing in a professional context, but what is less common is the acknowledgement of how important a woman’s sexual aliveness is to that wellbeing.

A woman cut off from that vital, life affirming current over time, withers.

And your projects and efforts wither, too.

 

I want to offer that tending your connection to this flow of creative power is deeply productive.

That prioritising feeling turned on in your life is deeply in service to your goals.

If you’re a woman who’s driven and inspired by your work in the world but you’ve woken up mid-career and can’t help but feel like you’re just going through the motions and you’ve lost your spark, or you’re trapped in your head and going round and round in familiar unsupportive patterns of thinking and feeling, perhaps you’d do well to explore making business – and life – a bit sexier, and finding connection once more to that which turns you on. ❤️‍🔥

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Never underestimate the power of your past. Because it’s not in the past. It’s here in this living moment with you – woven into your responses, choices and perceptions; baked into your nervous system and psyche through and reinforcement and repetition.

That doesn’t mean your past has to define you, not at all.

Though, you’re lying to yourself if you say ‘its in the past’, yet have done no work to clear the ripples of that past from your system to create space for something new.

Yesterday, in a session with my coach, I went ‘back in time’ to the end of 2020, when I went through an experience that was somewhat challenging for me.

Here is a sublime example

Despite acknowledging the challenge at the time, I realised looking back that I hadn’t fully resolved or digested what happened there.

Part of me stayed frozen in that experience, and on the subtlest of levels, I have gotten in my own way unconsciously ever since.

That past experience was with me in every moment. It informed my capacity and energy levels, choices and perceptions.

And this is how the past shapes us – you have experiences that your system ‘learns’ from, and you then – often completely unconsciously – adjust accordingly to avoid repeating painful or difficult events.

We are such clever adaptive creatures.

But, those ‘adaptations’ will inadvertently shape your behaviour, attitudes, thoughts and feelings in a way that can begin to inhibit your ability to fully show up for your business or career, relationships, and life in general.

If you bring the process of ‘learning’ from these past experiences into consciousness, you gift yourself the chance to mine the gold from the past, get the learnings and gifts link example: and then move forward with your life.

„ QUOTE DESIGN: I CALL THIS PROCESS ‘DIGESTING’ YOUR PAST EXPERIENCES, AND HAVE SPECIFIC PRACTICES I TEACH TO SUPPORT YOU TO DO THIS.“

I call this process ‘digesting’ your past experiences, and have specific practices I teach to support you to do this.

The challenges of the past – and your adaptations – can become like a cage you find yourself living in if you’re not aware, but this digestion process ensures your continued liberation…

Which past experiences do you need to free yourself from?

And this is how the past shapes us – you have experiences that your system ‘learns’ from, and you then – often completely unconsciously – adjust accordingly to avoid repeating painful or difficult events.

We are such clever adaptive creatures.

But, those ‘adaptations’ will inadvertently shape your behaviour, attitudes, thoughts and feelings in a way that can begin to inhibit your ability to fully show up for your business or career, relationships, and life in general.

If you bring the process of ‘learning’ from these past experiences into consciousness, you gift yourself the chance to mine the gold from the past, get the learnings.

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